Pepperidge Farm Warns of Cookie Shortage Because Goddammit, 2020! Santa, Do Something!

Consumers have put up with a lot this year. A toilet paper shortage. Ridiculous price surges on items like red meat. But this we simply will not stand for. Pepperidge Farm, maker of irresistible cookies like Mint Milanos, Bordeaux, and Chessmen, is warning customers that the cookie jar might be a little emptier this year.

Campbell Soup, the brand’s parent company, claims there are labor shortages and “supply constraints” that might impede the production of certain cookies, leaving store shelves bare of your favorite coffee break accompaniment.

“Cookie demand has been through the roof for months now and we’ve been working around the clock to meet it,” a Campbell’s spokesperson told Today Food. “Our cookies with unique shapes, like the Bordeaux and Chessmen varieties, have been more impacted by supply constraints. They’re very specific recipes, so because of demand, you might not be able to find as many of these specific varieties.”

Like other products during the pandemic – beer, popcorn, and pajamas come to mind – Americans have apparently been gobbling down cookies like there’s no tomorrow. (Because who knows if there is?) Cookie sales have increased as much as 25 percent since the start of the pandemic. Twenty percent of Americans cop to eating more than three cookies a day! That’d put even Cookie Monster to shame.

But the one we’re really concerned about isn’t the average Joe. It’s Santa Claus! If we don’t leave out a packed tray of sweet treats for Ol’ Saint Nick, will he move us indefinitely to the naughty list? (If you say, “That’s the way the cookie crumbles,” this conversation is over.)

“We’ve made these cookies for decades and we’ll continue to make them,” the spokesperson said. “There will be plenty of Pepperidge Farm cookies for Santa.”

We guess we’ll have to take your word for it…or make our own damn cookies. 2020, you can take our toilet paper, you can poach our red meat, but how dare you try to steal cookies from Santa!

Cover Photo: Richard Levine / Contributor (Getty Images)

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