Florida

Meanwhile in Florida: Couple Busted For Smashing on Public Road (What a Train Wreck)

This story gives a whole new meaning to the phrase “Get a room!” A couple in Florida (where else?) was recently apprehended after having sex on the side of the road, giving passing motorists quite an eyeful.

The afternoon delight happened on a Saturday around 2:45 p.m. Amber Gormley, 39, and Shawn McClelland, 30, got down and dirty in the city of Largo, part of the Tampa Bay area of Florida, in an “open area location of a busy area where all drivers could see then having intercourse,” cops say. Reports from witnesses included descriptions of McClelland eating Gormley out, fingering her, and other “penetrative acts.” Both parties confirmed the sex acts were consensual. (So. At least there’s that.)

The pair were charged with lewd and lascivious exhibition, which is a felony. McClelland also got slapped with a misdemeanor charge for possession of synthetic marijuana. The couple was held in the county jail on $10,000 bond.

No word on why the fuck buddies couldn’t wait until they were in private to, well, play with each other’s privates, but it’s easy to see why these two are into each other. (Not in that way.) McClelland has quite the rap sheet, including a 2018 misdemeanor conviction for swiping cat litter and peppermint tea (of all things) from a Walmart. Gormley boasts convictions for theft, obstruction, drug possession, and possession of burglary tools as well as a pending charge of meth possession.

We don’t know if these lovebirds are going to see any jail time, but if they do, we hope they aren’t granted any conjugal visits. The world has seen enough PDA from them to last a lifetime.

Cover Photo: Pinellas County Sheriff’s Office

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