New App Translates Cat Meows, Now Clearly Articulating Just How Much They Despise Your Presence

We love our pets. Dogs, cats, parrots, and even rabbits. We feed them, walk them (in the case of dogs), and dote on them constantly. We only know they like us in return based on how they wag their tails, bend down for a nice rub, or lie down at our feet. If only we could actually understand what they were barking, meowing, or chirping at us. Well, thanks to a new app you can. But it’s not for dog or bird owners; this is only for cat fanciers.

It’s called MeowTalk and it’s described as an app that translates feline purrs and meows into English. The idea for the app is based on the assumption that cats have nine specific “intents” they try to tell us through their various meows.

Obviously, your cat has more to say than just nine phrases, but it’s a little much to assume an app could translate all of your cat’s meows so you can have a nice chat about politics, religion, or time travel. It’s just not going to happen. Plus, we can only assume the only topics your cat actually wants to talk about are the intricacies of licking their butt hole and your impending demise.

Sadly, you won’t be able to learn that your cat not-so-secretly wants to murder you in your sleep. The app only translates things like “feed me,” “I’m in pain,” and “I’m in love.” That’s all well and good for a parlor trick. We don’t really care until we can finally hear why our cat wraps up her poop in the bathmat every time we go away for the weekend.

Photo: Kilito Chan (Getty Images)

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