Couples Claim This Surprising Sleeping Hack Is the Secret to a Happy Relationship

It used to be that the words “I need more space” meant the end of a relationship. Now, it seems that just might be the thing that saves it. A trend has emerged among cohabiting couples, and the ones who partake in it swear it keeps them together – ironically, by keeping them apart. It’s separate sleeping accommodations.

The New York Post recently profiled several twosomes who swear by separate beds – and sometimes, even separate bedrooms. Some couples come to the arrangement due to morning bird/night owl conflicts, snoring problems, the arrival of a new baby, or simply different bedtime routines. What they all agree on, however, is that sleeping alone is actually the best move they could’ve made to improve their partnerships. Some spouses even seek out his-and-hers boudoirs when they house-hunt.

“Most couples end up sleeping on the couch out of desperation, but this move shouldn’t be seen as an abandonment,” psychologist Wendy M. Troxel, author of the new book Sharing the Covers: Every Couple’s Guide to Better Sleep, told the Post. “Instead, see it an important way to keep your relationship healthy.”

Take Alina Adams, a romance writer and mother of three who hasn’t slept in the same bed with her husband for over 20 years. “The minute he got into bed he would wake me up because he snores,” she said about their early bed-sharing. “During that time, I spent many nights thinking of how to smother him with a pillow, which probably isn’t great for a marriage.”

The practice of couples sleeping apart isn’t entirely new. In Scandinavia, it isn’t unusual for couples to sleep in separate twin beds side by side. In Britain, the aristocracy has been known to maintain separate bedrooms for husbands and wives. Even presidents and first ladies of the United States often kept separate sleeping areas in the White House prior to the Ford Administration. And before the “swingin’ ‘60s,” many couples slept apart for hygienic reasons.

So maybe this isn’t a new trend so much as a comeback – and one worth trying if sleeping with your partner is ruining your relationship. You can still have sex; just like when you were first dating, all you have to negotiate is, “Your place or mine?”

Cover Photo: Image Source (Getty Images)

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