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People Would Rather Browse Their Dream Homes Than Have Sex, Survey Shows Binging Zillow Is the New YouPorn

It’s a sad sign of the times that there are a lot of things people would rather do these days than have sex. Perhaps one of the oddest items on that list, though, is house-hunting on Zillow. A new survey of 1,000 people’s Zillow browsing habits revealed that 49 percent of them would rather fantasize about their dream house on the real estate app than get down and dirty in bed.

Zillow, apparently, is the new YouPorn, and its addictive nature is having a detrimental effect on people’s lives just like porn does. Over half (56 percent) of respondents admitted they’d canceled plans with friends so they could browse the app instead. Forty-one percent copped to the fact that their housing fantasies have caused “multiple problems” in their lives. And 8 percent of respondents missed an important deadline because they couldn’t get off Zillow.

We can only assume this is because after a year-plus of quarantine, most of us are reprioritizing. You can survive without sex (as we’ve all discovered), but there’s no substitute for a comfortable place to call home. And in the absence of anyone to have sex with, we might as well imagine a more luxurious and spacious living space where we can properly wallow in our loneliness.

Besides, Zillow is a lot more fun than Tinder because houses don’t have to “like” you back. With the right amount of financing, you can possess that hot babe of a property. You don’t even have to buy her dinner first.

Cover Photo: Portra (Getty Images)

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