Quarantine Olympics: Bored New Yorker Walks Subway Tight Rope in His Underwear (Except Instead of Rope, Duct-Taped Boards)

If you have not felt supremely bored during coronavirus quarantine, then you must either have a very demanding job or you have the most entertaining roommates ever. As for the rest of us, there have been days when we’ve been climbing the walls because we’re so stir-crazy. Not literally climbing the walls, of course. But some people are.

OK, not walls, actually. But they have been performing dangerous subway stunts to pass the quarantine time. It’s happening in New York (where else?), where one man decided to stage his own “hood Olympics” around noon at the Fordham Road subway stop in the Bronx.

In his latest feat, he attempted a “man on a wire” act by duct taping several narrow wooden boards together, laying them across the subway tracks, and trying to cross them.

Oh, and he did this wearing only socks, boxer shorts, a face mask, and a beanie (cold-weather essentials, obviously).


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A post shared by Morris Cornbread (@morriscornbread)

At first, the man appears to slip, so a gawker offers him a hand (but just one, because he’s filming with the other one). Spoiler alert: the man doesn’t make it across. The boards break under his weight and he tumbles onto the tracks. Luckily for him, no train was approaching at the time.

The comments section of the video is pretty funny. Maybe even funnier than the stunt itself.

“BOY YOU KNOW YO ASS WAS NOT MAKING IT,” said @hec.never.lackin.

“U mad dumb…LMFAO,” commented @uhtaze.

“People was cheering him on, saying ‘You can do it,’” a passerby named Tyree Bowles told the New York Post. “Everybody was recording. I had to post mine real fast, like, damn this is crazy. Only in New York is where this happens.”

Maybe it only happens in New York because it’s stupid and dangerous and people in other places have more common sense? Who knows. What we can all agree on is that quarantine has gone on far too long if this is how we get our kicks.

Cover Photo: @morriscornbread (Instagram)

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