With Pay Phone Booths Gone, Superman Struggles to Find a Place to Change

Look! Up in the sky! It’s a bird! It’s a plane! It’s…wait. Where’s Superman?

This is usually the part where he comes in.

In a time where we need our superheroes the most, we are suddenly without phone booths. Coincidence? While crime, homelessness and anxiety are at all-time highs in American history, we just so happen to be without our red banana-hammocked hero, who despite being unfairly handsome, is strangely too shy to change without the concealment of a phone booth (even though the suit he flies around in for all to see is underneath his clothes). Could it be there’s something more going on with the Man of Steel? Is it the laces that trip him up? Does he struggle to tuck?

While phone booths are amongst the tallest casualties of the tech revolution, those magical towers of communication, which have gone the way of the dinosaur, are now more necessary than ever. For the millennial in us who can’t seem to put down the cell phone and instead walk into oncoming traffic, a phone booth might be the repurposed savior we need to quarantine people who feel the need to endlessly text and film themselves. It would sure take a lot off Superman’s plate, as he can focus on saving people who live actual lives, that is, assuming he can tell the difference between us and the sex robots.

Cover Photo: ROBYN BECK / Staff (Getty Images)

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