Naked Florida Man Breaks Into Home In Search Of Sesame Seeds

Photo: draconus (Getty)

Everybody has their reasons for breaking into somebody else’s home. You know, like jewelry, cash, drugs, and sesame seeds.

Wait, what?

According to Fox 13, a Largo man and his girlfriend were awakened Friday night by a naked dude rummaging through their kitchen on the prowl for some sesame seeds. No, seriously.

William Loland got up out of his bed to investigate, and sure shit, there was Martin Henderson naked as a jaybird and looking for those seeds.

“I get up, I see this guy, because I only had my night light on in the kitchen,” Loland said. “I thought it was a woman because he had long hair, and he was all nude. I thought it was a woman because he had a pot belly. So I asked, ‘How did you get in my house? Who are you?'”

naked man wanted sesame seeds

Henderson refused to leave both the kitchen and the house, so Loland decided to take matters into his own hands.

“I grabbed him by his neck, and I escorted him towards the door,” Loland said. “He was still naked. I said, ‘You’re lucky I don’t knock you out.’He said, ‘I don’t think you can.’ So that’s when I hit him. That’s when I hit him twice.”

Police eventually arrived on the scene and took Henderson into custody. Henderson told them he had been smoking spice “all day,” which pretty much explains the entire story.

People seem to get naked quite a bit in the Sunshine State: Florida Woman Shoots Naked Intruder Covered In His Own Poop