Americans have been forced to endure quite a bit of chaos and despair over the last few years. From a worldwide pandemic and near toppling of democracy to crashing markets and insanely high inflation, it’s pretty clear that marijuana needs to be made legal at the federal level to offset this absolute agony. So the last thing anyone needs to worry about is whether their woman is pooping the bed.
Due to the high-profile legal case involving actors Johnny Depp and Amber Heard, we first learned about the spiteful act of bed defecation. Amber Heard, of course, has denied doing the dirty deed, testifying that it was actually Depp’s Teacup Yorkie. Seeing as we all have (sadly) seen the infamous Heard turd, that Yorkie would have to have the anus of a Great Dane to pull off a stinky feat like that. You don’t exactly have to be Perry Mason to know only a human could pinch a loaf like that, and blaming the furbaby on the dump only vilifies Heard even more.
Considering the average person craps at least three times a day, there’s a real distinct chance of leaving a steamer on the Sealy. Incontinence while sleeping — or pooping the bed — isn’t as uncommon as you may think. In fact, fecal incontinence is an actual thing and prevalent among women. In other words, that might not be a chocolate kiss under your pillow.
So here’s a helpful guide to know if your woman is lying about pooping the bed.
Cover Photo: Image Source (Getty Images)
woman lying about pooping the bed
1. She Blames a Super Tiny Dog
2. She Omits Crocodile Tears
3. She Bursts Into Whining
4. She Gets Overly Defensive
5. She Blinks a Lot