Meanwhile in Florida: Man Attacks Woman With McDonalds Sauce Packets, Spices Up Life

Pasco County in Florida has one of the highest crime rates in America, which helps explain the peculiar case of one Jesus Oscar Ferrer, Jr. After his baby mama brought him the wrong condiment flavor from a local McDonald’s, Jesus showed his displeasure by pelting the woman with said sauce packets. To fend off Jesus’ sweet-and-sour-flavored wrath, the defendant grabbed his ample beard and yanked, prompting a tussle to ensue. Moments later, Jesus fled the scene but was later apprehended.

There must be something in the water down in Florida, as Jesus’ violent outburst fits like glove among a laundry list of bizarre happenings to emerge from the Sunshine State. These recent cases are sure to leave you scratching your head in disbelief (and steering clear of America’s wang), before realizing that — wait, it’s Florida — it all makes perfect sense.

Cover Photo: RichLegg (Getty Images)

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