There are a plethora of
streaming services literally at your fingertips these days, but unless you’re drowning in dough, you can’t subscribe to them all. Because each streaming service is tailored to a particular type of viewer, the one you choose says something about you. You are what you watch, after all, and if you’re like us, you spend a lot of time consuming entertainment. We’ve broken down each of the major streaming services in play today so you can decode your personality – or find a streaming service that’s better suited to you. Let the self-analysis begin!
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Streaming Service Says About You
You prefer quantity over quality, and Amazon Prime delivers with over 18,000 movies and almost 2,000 TV shows for your viewing pleasure. (That’s four times more films than Netflix.) When you want to waste time finding something to watch, Amazon Prime is your go-to streaming service. And when you just want some noise in the background to keep you company, you can’t go wrong with any one of Amazon Prime’s offerings.
You’re always on the cutting edge of new technology, and that tends to mean that anything Apple does, you’re all for it, even if it’s outrageously expensive. You were the first person to subscribe to
Apple TV+ (or at least, that’s what you tell yourself) and you’ve already binge-watched every original movie and TV show they offer. You refuse to be left out of the loop and FOMO waits for no one.
You’re a kid at heart. There’s nothing more satisfying to you than spending an entire weekend with fantastical characters in animated worlds or catching up on the latest comic book movies. You don’t mind watching the same TV show or movie multiple times; it’s all about the nostalgia for you, and Disney+ provides the perfect form of transportation to those beloved bygone days.
You’re dark, serious, and mysterious. You like your entertainment grim and, at times, based on real life. From
and The Outsider to Game of Thrones and Euphoria , you want to spend your free time witnessing the worst things that can befall human beings. Succession
You’re a cheapskate and are a reluctant streaming service subscriber. You miss the olden days of TV, when your choices were limited to a dozen channels (or however many your TV antenna would let you watch). You long for the era of three-letter networks and “must-see TV” and programming the VCR if you thought you might miss your favorite show. But since the world isn’t going to go backwards, ever, you’ve resigned yourself to this sad excuse for a streaming service, and only watch content from the analog days.
You’ve been a movie buff since the days when Netflix made you mail in your DVDs. You want high-quality, well-written entertainment, and you’ll take it in any form this streaming service offers up, be it comedy, drama, or documentary. Sure, sometimes you run out of good things to watch, but it only forces you to dig deeper into the depths of the archive and surprise yourself with a hidden gem of a TV show or movie.
You naughty devil, you. You want to be not just entertained, but titillated. If your viewing options veer into soap opera-esque territory, that’s all right with you, as long as there’s enough sex, intrigue, and relationship drama to keep you glued to the screen. You get hooked on titles like
The Affair, Billions, and Californication.
You’re a man’s man, and you like nothing better than to spend Saturday and Sunday in the garage, propped in your recliner, beer in hand, watching the game. It doesn’t even really matter which game, as long as it features brawny men battling each other for a ball and an overexcited commentator who screams directly into the mic. That’s why fuboTV, with its non-stop sports action, is the only streaming service you need.