Party Tricks: The Cheapest Ways To Stock Your Bar Before the Festivities
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Don Draper, Sam Malone, and Mo from The Simpsons; what do all these leading men have in common? In addition to offensive vocabulary and a square jaw, all three luminaries have the uncanny ability to finesse a sophisticated cocktail out of thin air quicker than Dwayne Johnson releases movies about world-ending catastrophes. While we can’t all be iconic debutants of style and class all the time, becoming the Lothario of liquors with an exceptional home bar is attainable and even affordable.
A well-maintained alcohol armory can provide endless opportunities to impress friends, enrage frenemies, and even gain the attention of that attractive new neighbor. The main key to any home bar is to start with what you typically drink, as long as it’s not Zima, and then build from there.
Here are some options that won’t break the bank and send you back to two-buck Chuck.
Easy drinking: The Best 2-Ingredient Cocktails For Lazy Mixologists
Gin gets a bad rap sometimes. Sure, when taken straight up, it tastes like a Christmas tree. But gin mixes well and comes in various botanical and fruit infusions. Give it a shot...or a mix.
Bourbon (Option 1): Bulleit
Millennials finally contributed something worthwhile other than pirate mustaches to the world. We're hooked.
Bourbon (Option 2): Evan Williams
This classic but inexpensive bourbon does the trick, on the rocks or mixed. In the words of Dave Chappelle, it’ll get you drunk.
Photo: Evan Williams
Blended Whiskey: Johnnie Walker Red Rye Finish
An alternate whiskey with some brass to it, Johnnie Walker will never let you down. The blend is made from four whiskies including malt from Cardhu and grain from Port Dundas. We have no clue where those places are, probably Scotland.
Scotch Whiskey: Monkey Shoulder
This is hands-down the best name in the business. Or maybe we're a sucker for marketing. We can’t wait for the top-shelf version to be released, Monkey Kneecap.
This vodka is non-GMO and organic, just the way nature intended.
Flavored Vodka: Cupcake Vodka
Go ahead and judge us, we don’t care. Trader Joe's is the mecca of cheap booze and this really tastes like cupcake frosting. You’d be losing money if you don’t drink it, it's just math.
Tequila: Espolon Blanco
It’s not endorsed by George Clooney, but it’s been every tequila lover’s secret weapon for years. There’s even a reposado, anejo, and extra anejo release for when that quarterly bonus check comes in.
Mixers: La Croix Bubbly Water
This stuff is bubbly liquid unicorn dreams in a can. The invention of La Croix was a mark of greatness for mankind, and yet no one knows how to pronounce the name correctly. Side note: Pamplemousse is actually grapefruit.
Cost: $5 for 8-pack