Conspiracy theories used to be cool. Honestly, who doesn’t love shouting, “Dinosaurs are fake!” into a room full of children and watching them freak out? But last week, after a bunch of TikTokers started burning snowballs to prove snow is fake, we realized that rabbit holes are really no place for human beings after all.
According to OG cabal conjecturers (see what we did there?) the term “conspiracy theorist” was created by the CIA to cast doubt on anti-establishment types who were openly critical of the investigation into JFK’s assassination. Since then, the culture has shifted from the hands of underground nerd savants and political protestors to the barking masses huddled inside the echo chambers of the internet.
Don’t get us wrong. A healthy amount of skepticism is mandatory for any self-respecting hash-tagger in this day and age. But it’s not so great when we become totally unhinged obsessives who believe real snow is a Chinese plot or an army of dogs in sweater vests are surveilling Americans using their privileged access to mailmen. If that sounds pretty dumb, we’ve got a whole list of even dumber conspiracy theories that will knock your IQ down 100 points just by reading. Don’t say we didn’t warn you.