Speed Binge: 10 Netflix Shows We Want to Watch at a Faster Pace (For One Reason or Another)
Netflix is testing out a variable playback speed option for its subscribers. Although it’s still in the testing phase, this new feature would allow viewers to watch Netflix content at 1.5x playback speed. Naturally, this news raised a red flag among the filmmaking community, with multiple prominent personalities such as Judd Apatow coming out against the new feature. While Netflix has indeed churned out some good movies and television in the past few years, they have also produced far more bad content than good content. As it turns out, Netflix is merely introducing this new feature to entice viewers into consuming their shitty content at a faster rate. With that in mind, here are 10 terrible Netflix shows that are probably more enjoyable at a faster playback speed.
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'Gilmore Girls: A Year In The Life'
While fans had been clamoring for a follow-up to the favorite CW show for some time after the show ended, Netflix thought it would be a good idea to capitalize on that demand by producing a follow-up series. Instead, Gilmore Girls: A Year in the Life would become Netflix’s then most-binged show over the course of 24 hours. At the same time, the show garnered mixed reactions, with one critic going as far to call the show “hostile toward fans, women, and storytelling in general.” Ultimately, Gilmore Girls: A Year in the Life seems like the type of miniseries that is perfect for a speed binge.
Although Netflix spent over $100 million in cold hard cash to produce the first season of this historical drama, Marco Polo turned out the be quite the dreary experience. While Netflix was clearly looking for a Game of Thrones-level hit, the show was a bit of a dud with both critics and viewers alike. Netflix canceled Marco Polo after only two drawn-out seasons, which makes this lackluster piece of content perfect for watching at a faster speed.
'Friends From College'
When it comes to assembling great comedic ensemble casts, Friends From College is easily one of Netflix’s most impressive shows. Unfortunately, they forgot to write a good story in the process. Filled with unlikable and irredeemable characters, this series is a shitty version of shows like Friends or How I Met Your Mother. Even if you watch this series at a faster rate, it would only mitigate the mediocrity that Friends From College provides.
Disjointed is the type of show that is so bad that Netflix would cancel it less than two months after the release of the first and only season. This Chuck Lorre-produced series stars Kathy Bates as the owner of a marijuana dispensary and is about as dull and unfunny as it sounds. Even if you watch the show stoned, it appeals to the lowest common denominator, so it’s hard to find anything remotely funny about this Disjointed – except maybe for watching it at an accelerated speed.
Although many of the Netflix-produced Marvel shows such as Daredevil and Jessica Jones were big hits both critically and commercially, Iron Fist is easily the worst of the bunch. The first season of this series is not up to the quality of other shows. The Defenders certainly improved upon Danny Rand’s characterization, but you have to slog through 13 hours of material to get to it. With that in mind, this is a great speed binge option for all the Marvel completists out there.
Although it somehow is one of Netflix’s most popular shows, Fuller House is the streaming giant’s most blatant attempt to cash in on pure nostalgia. It’s the type of series that is filled with cheap jokes and kitschy situations, with one reviewer even calling it “a port parody without the porn.” Considering that Fuller House was renewed for a fifth season at the beginning of 2019, Netflix seems to be introducing its variable playback option specifically so viewers don’t have to sit through five seasons of this downright awful revival show.
Out of all the terrible crap that Netflix has produced, Real Rob represents the bottom of the barrel – and that’s saying something for the streaming service that is also the home of Adam Sandler’s movies. The series portrays an “exaggerated yet brutally honest” sitcom version of Schneider, which is interspersed with real-life stand-up from the comedian. If this sounds bad to you, that’s because it absolutely is. It seems as if this entire series may have been created just to test their new speed binge feature. In all seriousness, it’s hard to fathom why anyone thought this poor man’s version of Seinfeld was a good idea – let alone that it would be popular.
There’s no doubt that The I-Land is a pretty blatant rip-off of survival shows like Lost and The Walking Dead. In fact, we used a GIF from the former and you didn’t even realize it. The series has only been out for a few months, but it is already being hailed as possibly the worst show that Netflix has ever produced. While this show doesn’t get anywhere close to the shows that it is trying to emulate, The I-Land is also in the running for the series with the worst title of all time. Perhaps a quick speed binge can erase the fundamental misunderstanding of the show’s quality by its creators. However, it seems impossible to enjoy this show, even if Netflix’s new variable playback feature appears to be a fitting option for it.
It’s pretty evident that The Ranch is Netflix’s attempt to recreate the formula of Two and a Half Men with the cast of That '70s Show. Yet, somehow, it offers mediocrity at its finest. Despite having some legitimately talented actors like Sam Elliott, Debra Winger, and Ashton Kutcher, the series comes off as a rote sitcom that hangs its cowboy hat on a gimmick. More importantly, the fact that Danny Masterson was unceremoniously dropped from the show after sexual assault allegations only make the show even more unfunny. Could Netflix be introducing this new variable playback option so that viewers can speed binge their way through all 80 episodes of this terrible show? Only time will tell.
As one of the first Netflix original series to secure a green light from Netflix only to get canceled, Hemlock Grove is one of the oft-forgotten early shows that Netflix produced. Critics panned the series, with Time calling it one of the worst shows on television in 2013. Although the series was released on the heels of the critically-acclaimed first season of House of Cards, Hemlock Grove managed to slog its way through three seasons due to a loyal cult following. Even though producer Eli Roth couldn’t manage to save this lackluster horror series, watching it at a faster pace might legitimately improve the quality of this slow-burn story.