Ranking Our 12 Favorite Chocolate Bars In Order From ‘Love Them’ To ‘I’d Rather Be Diabetic Than Quit’

Photo: NBC

Well, we’ve really gone and done it this time, only now it’s with 12 of our favorite chocolate bars. But we’re not just ranking them from bad to good or least addictive most addictive, as we all know, the chocolate candy bar tends to always be good and always addictive. Break you off a piece? I think not.

We’ve had our way in past, ranking pizza and the great American hamburger, usually much to your disagreement. So we thought we’d go straight for the heart this time and hit you where it hurts most: chocolate candy bars. Only this time, we’re ranking them from 12 to 1 on a scale of “love them” to “I’d rather be diabetic than quit.”

Join us as we unfavorable rank the best of chocolate coated candy crunches, judged harshly by yours truly based on the amount of peanuts involved, the minimalist approach and, most importantly, who was wise enough to add the cookie crunch. And then there’s obviously the missing ingredient, one which will catapult one candy bar to the top, and you’ll never guess who.

Now, let’s see how many Seinfeld references we can squeeze in here.

Ranking Our 12 Favorite Chocolate Bars In Order From ‘Love Them’ To ‘I’d Rather Be Diabetic Than Quit’

If this weren’t restricted to candy bars, you know who would win (Junior Mints).

More ranking unhealthy things: Ranking the Best Fries in the America Fast Food Biz