KFC
KFC Beyond Fried chicken https://app.asana.com/0/1135954362417873/1201614863741392/f Credit: KFC

KFC Selling Plant-Based Fried Chicken (What the Cluck Is the Colonel Thinking?)

It’s New Year’s resolution time, and many people have vowed that 2022 is going to be the year that they go meatless. (We are not these people, nor do we want to be friends with them.) Like a lot of fast-food restaurants, KFC is trying to cater to vegans, vegetarians, and flexitarians alike…with a new plant-based chicken product.

It’s called Beyond Fried Chicken and was developed by Beyond Meat exclusively for the poultry chain. It took over two years for whatever the hell this is (we hesitate to call it food) to come to fruition.

According to a press release, the offering is “packed with delicious flavor and the juicy satisfaction that you’d expect from KFC’s iconic fried chicken but in a plant-based option that’s still finger lickin’ good.” (If you say so, PR wizards.)

It can’t possibly taste as good as the original recipe. They just don’t make plants that way. But in case Beyond Fried Chicken is inedible, there’s always dipping sauces – Honey BBQ, Ranch, Honey Mustard and KFC Sauce – to disguise the flavor. Or you can fill up with Secret Recipe Fries and a medium drink, which come in KFC’s only plant-based combo meal (and there goes that health halo associated with vegetarianism).

Those who hate all things delicious can try this Frankenfood starting Jan. 10 at KFC locations throughout the U.S. As for the rest of us, we’ll stick to the tried and true (and crispy and greasy) carnivorous menu items. Unlike Colonel Sanders, we haven’t gone clucking crazy.

Cover Photo: KFC

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