Honest Timeline: Hosting This Year’s Fourth of July Party

The Fourth Of July is the perfect excuse to do exactly what you wanted to do this summer: get drunk and throw an impromptu rager. Because you’re an adult, you’ll skip the Facebook invite, opting instead to send out a series of group texts to people who don’t know each other. The night before, you’ll swing by the store to stock up on the three Bs: burgers, beers, and booze. Which, of course, you’ll start drinking the second you get home until you pass out. When you wake up the next day, it’s 30 minutes before your party. You make a pro move and temper your pounding hangover with a shower beer. This revives your body for the day’s extravaganza so you can focus on more important things, like celebrating America’s birthday. Here’s how it’s all going to go down.

Cover Photo: Jacob Lund (Getty Images)

Honest timeline: A Highly Accurate First Edible Experience

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What was throwing your first Fourth of July party like? Anything beautiful disasters we missed? Let us know in the comments!

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