fourth of july
Young woman laying on a bed covered with the american flag

Fourth of July Fails: All of These People Are Ridiculously Terrible at Celebrating America’s Independence Day

Photo: Elitsa Deykova (Getty Images)

For Americans, there’s no more important date on the calendar than the Fourth of July. It’s the date we mark our independence from England by grilling burgers, drinking more beer than we probably should, laying out in the sun until it feels like our skin is going to peel off, running around wildly waving sparklers, and shooting massive fireworks into the sky bothering babies and dogs for miles around.

During the weeks leading up to the holiday, if we have big plans, we usually envision a day that begins with multiple viewings of Bill Pullman’s epic speech from Independence Day, a morning of lying in an oversize innertube in a pond, lake, or pool with a frosty brew in hand, and an afternoon featuring bowls of greasy chips (and multiple dips) as far as the eye can see, and more grilled meats that our colon can possibly handle (all day long).

We also imagine perfect weather. The date should (and will be) around 80 degrees, sunny, and not too humid. There should be no rain, lightning, or thunder as raining on America’s biggest party is as unpatriotic as wearing a David Beckham jersey while chugging Newcastle at your neighborhood block party.

But regardless of how we envision this most beloved of all holidays, we definitely don’t imagine the horrible, embarrassing fails that are pretty much guaranteed to happen when you mix booze, fireworks, and water. Check out 10 of our favorites below.


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