What Your Favorite Batman Says About You
Photo: Warner Bros.
“Not my Batman” is a term that’s been in vogue for the past few years, but it’s an idea that has existed since the Dark Knight’s debut, way back in 1939. But Batman, like all of literature’s greatest characters, is open to interpretation. He’s been a dark knight; a campy, caped crusader; a loner; a lover; a father and a son. Batman has been, in his own words, “whatever [we] need him to be.” In truth, every version of Batman is “our Batman.”
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Still, fans have their favorite versions of the character and we do not begrudge them their personal tastes. But your choice of Batman says a lot about you. Are you an angry loner or a patriarch? Are you a vigilante who stops crime by any means necessary or do you have a very strict code of ethics by which you abide?
Regardless of which version of the character is your favorite, it’s safe to assume that your choice says a lot about who you are as a person. So put on your cape, punch a clown, and dance the Batusi, because we’re diving into what your favorite version of Batman says about you.
Kevin Conroy Batman
The Kevin Conroy-voiced Batman from the hit '90s animated show is what many people consider to be not only their Batman, but the Batman.
If the Batman: The Animated Series Batman is your favorite, you're probably a pretty nostalgic person. You might wax poetic about previous decades when music, TV, movies and cartoons were "better." You're also probably a bit of a loner. Instead of being out late on a Saturday night, you prefer to be home, reading old comic books and re-watching television episodes you've seen dozens of times. And there's absolutely nothing wrong with that!
Michael Keaton Batman
Similarly, the Michael Keaton/Tim Burton era probably holds a special place in your heart if you grew up in the late '80s or early '90s. This Batman was a vast departure from the Batman previously seen on screens. This Batman was dark. He was serious. He was, for many, everything fans had wanted their Batman-on-film to be.
If this is your favorite Batman, you might also be somewhat of a loner. Black makes up the majority of colors in your wardrobe. You might be an artist, with a taste for all things dramatic and Gothic. You write dark poetry but might also be really into architecture.
Also, just like this movie's Bruce Wayne and his relationship with Vicky Vale, you might have commitment issues. The difference is, Batman is a lone vigilante fighting crime on a nightly basis. You just haven't gotten over your ex.
Adam West Batman
If the 1960s-era Adam West Batman is your favorite, you don't take yourself, or life, too seriously. "All the world's a stage," you say to yourself. And you were born to be a star. You're a generally happy, good-natured, affable type. Life is one big joke that you're in on and you just want to make people happy whilst weirdly dancing when you're high on drugs.
Val Kilmer Batman
If the Val Kilmer-era Batman is your favorite version, your favorite kind of ice cream is vanilla. You probably wear a lot of khakis and polo shirts. And that's OK! There's nothing wrong with being ordinary. If you're a guy, you're probably really good at being some girl's best friend. If you're a gal, you were probably president of the honor society. And you should be proud of yourself!
You're bland, but nice to have around. And at least you're not as bad as the next guy.
George Clooney Batman
If the George Clooney Batman is your favorite Batman, you should spend less time reading snarky articles and more time seeing your therapist. Seriously dude, who hurt you?
Christian Bale Batman
Chris Nolan (yeah, we call him Chris, NBD) told what was, perhaps, the greatest Batman story of all time with his Dark Knight Trilogy. It was rooted in realism and focused on Bruce Wayne just as much as it did his costumed counterpart.
If the Chris Bale (yeah, him too) and Chris Nolan version of Batman is your favorite, you're definitely more of a realist. You think better in logic than in emotion. You also probably read a lot. Literature and storytelling are more important to you than rich visuals and bombastic acting. You don't see Batman just as a great comic book character; you see him as a great literature character and you take him very, very seriously.
Why so serious? Because it's Batman for f'n sake!
Ben Affleck Batman
If the Ben Affleck-era Batman from films like Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice or Justice League is your favorite Batman, you possibly have a lot of unresolved anger issues. You might be mad at your mom and dad (unless her name is Martha...that name seems to deflect any sort of anger). Perhaps you've lived a tough, violent, lonely life. Every friend you've had has either moved away or died (possibly at the hands of a clown). You might have a string of one-night stands and you don't think it's weird to gulp a glass of wine in lieu of coffee in the mornings.
The Will Arnett/Lego version of Batman is a love letter to the character. It embraces everything Batman has been and will continue to be. He is serious, but not too serious. He's funny, but not too funny.
Just like you! You're a pretty well-balanced individual. You work hard, play hard and eat Lobster Thermidor hard. You appreciate history but you're not nailed to it and you're pretty open-minded.
If Lego Batman is your favorite Batman, then all of the Batmen are your favorite Batman, and that's about it should be.
Except Clooney. Not you, Clooney.