Chris Brown Is In Solitary, Can Only Shower 3 Times A Week

 

It’s always a great plan to give a sociopath time for silent reflection.

Chris Brown will stink to holy hell … because he’s only allowed one shower every two days. According to our sources, Brown — who will sit in jail until April 23 — is in solitary confinement 23 hours a day … which means he won’t have a cellmate to disgust with his vile odor. We’re told Brown is allowed to work out in his cell and can read library books.

Man, this should be great rehabilitation for Chris Brown. Forced isolation, limited human contact, denial of regular hygiene, and side eyes from the librarian. He should come out of this a completely changed person. Or, in an even more realistic scenario, he’ll come out free but trapped in the prison of his own mind ready to unleash his anger on the system on the first person he sees. Solid plan. Solitary is more for his protection in this case, but they really should put him in general population. A regimented schedule, trips to the cafeteria, an hour each day to go outside to socialize and exercise with his fellow inmates, a chance to enroll in a class, and to be taught to obey authority without question. Wait, I think I just described public school. Either or.

 
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