Although she’s never received training in the art of self-defense, Rihanna went as Sexy Ninja Turtle for Halloween, because whatever Rihanna wears makes you want to have sex with her. I normally don’t like reboot movies, but if they can remake TMNT tomorrow with Rihanna and Megan Fox, then I’d actually pay to see that. I may even go by myself. And sit in the back. And wear a long coat. No, only because it’s fall and movie theaters are pretty cold. Don’t make this weird.