robbery

Meanwhile In Chicago: Mom of Train Robbery Suspect Drags Her Boy to Police Station, How Embarrassing

Just because you grow up doesn’t mean your mom stops being your mom. In fact, she may be mom-ing extra hard once you’re an adult because she fears losing you. One Chicago man learned this recently after his mother turned him in for a robbery.

Zion Brown is an 18-year-old sophomore at Loyola University Chicago. Allegedly, he stole $100 from a Metra train conductor at gunpoint. He might have gotten away with it, too, if his mom hadn’t recognized him as the masked suspect in security camera photos. When she realized it was her boy that police were looking for, she dragged him down to the police station in Calumet City. He has since been charged with armed robbery and is being held without bail.

In a hearing, Brown’s private defense attorney claimed the young man was hungry and was looking for something to eat, which makes us wonder: 1) Who’s paying for that pricey attorney? And 2) Doesn’t your mama feed you?

Next time you’re hungry, Zion, just take a few bucks out of your mom’s purse like a normal person. And get us some gum while you’re in there.

Cover Photo: Metra Police Department

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