VAN HORN, TEXAS - JULY 20: The New Shepard Blue Origin rocket lifts-off from the launch pad carrying Jeff Bezos along with his brother Mark Bezos, 18-year-old Oliver Daemen, and 82-year-old Wally Funk prepare to launch on July 20, 2021 in Van Horn, Texas. Mr. Bezos and the crew are riding in the first human spaceflight for the company. (Photo by Joe Raedle/Getty Images)

Mandatory Funniest Tweets About Jeff Bezos’ Dick-Shaped Rocket on Twitter, Ship Matches the Drapes (And Probably Everything Else)

In unavoidable news of the day, Jeff Bezos went to space and back. Whoop-de-fucking-doo. The billionaire Amazon founder took his first flight with Blue Origin and a group of ‘space misfits’ on Tuesday morning, launching from Van Horn, Texas, and returning to Earth 10 minutes later. (Clearly, a quickie.)

We were less than impressed with this disgusting display of wealth and masculine insecurity, but Bezos (who is rather phallus-looking himself, come to think of it) seemed awfully proud of his accomplishment. And while the richest man in the world was trending on Twitter most of the day, people weren’t applauding his out-of-this-world feat but rather making fun of his undeniably phallic rocket. In honor of this semi-historic day, we rounded up the funniest tweets about Bezos’ dick-like mode of transportation.

Cover Photo: Joe Raedle / Staff (Getty Images)


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