Wisconsin Woman Arrested For Drawing Peanut Butter Dicks On Cars She Thought Were At A Trump Rally
Photo: Lucas Cornwell (Getty)
The Florida woman who made a donation of pubic hair to the Trump campaign succeeded in her mission, as did the Mexican brewery who tricked Trump supporters into buying anti-Trump shirts. But the woman below didn’t exactly pull off what she wanted to do. Well, she did, but it was just on the wrong folks.
Christina Ferguson, a 32-year-old woman from Amherst, Wisconsin, was arrested for disorderly conduct after smearing peanut butter all over 30 parked cars. And this lady not only smeared the peanut butter, but she used it to draw dicks. Not that’s creativity.
According to Stevens Point City Times, Ferguson thought she was pulling her act on a bunch of folks at a Donald Trump rally when in reality it wasn’t a Trump rally at all, but a meeting for the Tomorrow River Conservation Club. Whoops. And Ferguson might have known that had she not blown a .218 on a deputy’s breathalyzer and copped to drinking both beer and blackberry brandy. So yeah, that makes sense. Ferguson also apparently yelled at folks at the meeting about her hate for Trump, all while holding a jar of peanut butter. Smooth. Pun intended.
According the the police report, when police confronted Ferguson she claimed her innocence, all while licking peanut butter off of her fingers.
And here is what this genius had to say:
“Peanut buttering is better than firebombing, and Trump plans on firebombing everybody in other countries”
Well, peanut butter never hurt anyone. Well, that’s not true. If you have a peanut allergy it could kill you, so I guess that’s not entirely accurate.
And if you were wondering what kind of peanut butter Ferguson used as you should be wondering: “Family-size jar of low-sodium, creamy natural Jif.”
Hey, low-sodium, at least those dicks were made out of relativity heathy peanut butter.
h/t Death and Taxes