Hellbent on Consent: Making the First Move Without Becoming A #MeToo Statistic
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The times, they are a-changin’, and because of this, we’re all being forced to reevaluate how we approach people in the #MeToo era, especially women. But whether you’re a guy or gal, we all have to work on our manners, from the way we talk at work to how we approach sex with a stranger. While many men fear they’ll be outed for saying the wrong thing, we’re popping in to say there’s no need to be afraid. Just don’t be an asshole.
But in case you still fear accidentally earning a Harvey Weinstein Badge of Discourage, learn yourself some knowledge on things like consent and not being a gross prick. Check out our tips on how to confidently make the first move while protecting yourself in the process (First hint: Do not defile your houseplants, at least not when you have company).
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Ask What She's Comfortable With
If you're planning on having sex with her you should be able to communicate with her. That means asking permission each step of the way, starting with kissing.
No Really Does Mean No
If you ask and are denied, that's it. Game over. If you're living in the Dark Ages and choose to lean in for a kiss and she turns her head, it means the same thing as her saying no. Just stop and move on with your life.
If She Changes Her Mind, Game Over
If she says you can engage in anything sexual, even kissing, but then asks you to stop, just stop. It's that simple. If she wants things to end, you end them.
If you're not getting the answer you're looking for, let it go. Nothing is sadder or grosser than a man who can't take no for an answer. Once she says no, anything you push to do starts hovering in the gray area that may get you in big trouble.
You're Now Having The Best Kind Of Sex, The Consensual Kind
Once she gives you the go ahead, you don't need to ask how to have sex with her. Hopefully you've already talked about what she's comfortable with. So you can focus on taking her to Pleasuretown, the way God intended.
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Is there anything you’ve learned to help breach the topic of consent with your partner? Teach other men what you’ve learned by sharing your story in the comments!