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Online dating apps such as Tinder and Bumble have lowered the barrier of entry to dating for millions of people, but there’s just one problem: ghosting. Just about everyone who uses these platforms has done it in one way or another, whether intentionally or not. While it might seem like an easy way to avoid the anxiety of actually meeting someone, it’s had a tremendously negative impact on people.
Bumble has found it to be such a problem that it’s hired an in-house “ghosting expert.” Her name is Kate Leaver, and she specializes in understanding the culture and behaviors around people who match with potential partners only to leave them hanging, thereby abandoning any possibility of pursuing a relationship further.
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Speaking to The Telegraph, Leaver shared how one woman she recently spoke to had been ghosted dozens of times. “If you experience ghosting multiple times, it just strengthens this idea in your head that you’re unlovable,” she said. “It can also feel like the dating scene is broken, so why bother with it?”
I’ve joined forces with @bumble to fight the scourge of ghosting this Halloween. If you have a ghosting dilemma, find this card on your Bumble app and submit a question. I’ll be answering them in time for the spookiest day of the year. #dontgetghosted #halloween pic.twitter.com/8Fu1lOBTyv
— Kate Leaver (@kateileaver) October 29, 2018
The biggest problem she’s found is that online dating apps give the impression that you can match with hundreds of people only to pick one person to actually move forward with, or ignore everyone altogether. “There isn’t accountability on apps,” she said, adding that people are treated as “disposable,” which can lead to mental health repercussions.
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Leaver will initially be available via Twitter to help provide personalized tips for people who are tired of being ghosted. In the future, Bumble may have new features to help reduce the prevalence of ghosting.