Michigan Man Got Buck Naked At A Meat Counter

On second thought, kids, let’s just go home and order some pizza.

According to the New York Daily News, a 61-year-old Novi man walked into a local Kroger grocery store last Saturday and made his way toward the meat counter.

And because he was butt-ass naked, the only thing between his man meat and some choice steaks was a thin sheet of display glass.

Even in Michigan these days, leaning against the glass deli case while you’re buck naked is frowned upon, and police were called to the store. When they arrived on the scene, they said it was obvious that the man was having a “medical episode,” and they quietly escorted his naked ass out of the store in handcuffs.

It’s unknown if charges will be brought against the man, as there were no signs of alcohol or drug use.

It’s also unknown if they’re going to bestow the protective glass with some kind of heroism award because let’s be honest: Never before had it been more necessary.

Well, now you’re definitely not getting on the plane: Man Pissed About Overbooked Flight Strips Naked

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