The David Silver ‘BH90210’ Master Class to Dancing in Public
Should you find yourself attempting to bust a move at a party, wedding or just drunk alone in an open area, we’re going to defer to David Silver and his master class on dancing in public. As the BH90210 reboot gets underway, there’s no better time to delve into Brian Austin Green’s classic ’90s David Silver dance moves from Beverly Hills 90210, which will forever be bronzed in TV history’s biggest regrets (he would likely agree). Follow the guide below for specific instructions on how to truly embarrass yourself in public. Why go for the gold when you can move like Silver?
Get the Party Started (Careful, You Might Be a Little Rusty)
Find yourself a nice girl and get out on that dance floor. Watch your step and try not to break her toes.
Lube Up Those Legs and Liver
OK, that was bad, but nothing gets the rust off like a little social libation. Just don't overdo it, unless you like yacking in public.
Let Your Arms Propel Your Entire Body
Whoa now, slow down, kid! You're going to fly away if you keep that up.
OK, Not That Slow
You don't want to look like you're 50 either...
Start Slow, Find Your Rhythm
Move side to side and see if there's any actual balance in your legs. You didn't stretch first, did you? Son of bitch!
Gradually Speed Things Up
Add a hard neck jerk and some weird hand movements. Dammit, did you take Adderall again? You look like a full-body dry-heave.
Seriously, What Are You Doing?
These are the days of social media. We could not encourage any of these moves less.
OK, Stop Everything
You are not sweet, people are filming you. Trending #GoForTheSilver
Take a Good Look in the Social Media Mirror
It's haunting to see yourself like that, isn't it? It's like watching yourself have sex, except you're all alone and look like Tommy Bahama dressed you.
You'll done dancing for good, right? Stay home forever with the curtains drawn.