Rachel Hunter is Almost Free

Rachel Hunter will be a free woman this week when her divorce from Rod Stewart will be finalized after a seven year legal battle. The pair, who married after dating for three months, have been seperated since 1999, but have finally reached a settlement on child support for their two children. Hunter signed a prenuptial agreement in 1990.

I should be a free woman by the end of the week. I can finally move on. It feels great.”

You ever wonder why a hot chick like Rachel Hunter would marry a fugly mess like Rod Stewart? In 1990 he was worth $100 million dollars. Apparently that’s a good way to get supermodels to have sex with you. I live in my car, but I called Rachel and told her that I would kill Kimberly Stewart, so I’m pretty confident we can work something out.