Kacey Jordan Is Sane

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Charlie Sheen‘s former receiver, Kacey Jordan, was hospitalized earlier this week for a suicide attempt and put under psychiatric hold. She denies this. E! Online says:

“It was not as bad as the first report said,” Charlie Sheen’s former good-time gal tells E! News, referring to reports that police were called to her room at the Peninsula Hotel in Chicago, where they found her with cuts on her arms and her room littered with prescription pills, booze and broken glass.

But Jordan can explain.

“The cops were called because I was a disturbance in the hotel and I was mad when they got there,” she says. “I chugged a glass of Jack and Coke in front of them and threw the glass on the ground before telling them to take me.”

With police concluding that a handful of disturbing tweets she had posted were not serious, Jordan was taken into custody and put on a 48-hour psychiatric hold at Northwestern Memorial Hospital after reportedly charging at one of the officers while holding a corkscrew.

She admits to having cut herself earlier in the evening, but not with the intent of killing herself.

“They took me away in handcuffs and took me to the ER and later sent me to the psych ward,” Jordan says. “I was the only sane person in there.”

Right. Claiming to be the only sane person in a psych ward is generally a good sign that you’re fucked up. Also good signs that you’re fucked up? Attacking cops with a corkscrew, having sex with Charlie Sheen, and having “specializes in DP” on your resume.