Pimp Sues Nike for Not Warning Him Their Shoes are Dangerous When Used to Assault People

I guess pimpin’ really ain’t easy.

In June of 2012, Portland pimp Sirgiorgio Clardy robbed and beat a “customer” with his Jordans so bad that the victim require

d stitches and plastic surgery on his nose. He also beat the woman he forced to work as a prostitute to the point where blood was leaking from her ears. A jury found him guilty of (among other things) assault and robbery, and Clardy was given a sentence of 100 years in the pen.

According to a lawsuit filed this week, however, Clardy claims it wasn’t entirely his fault. Who shares the rest of the blame in this pimp game gone wrong? You guessed it: Nike. And for failing to warn him that if he took off his Jordans and used them to beat the ever-living piss out of people, it would result in some rather serious personal trauma, they owe him $100 million:

Do (sic) to the fact that these defendants … failed to warn of risk or to provide an adequate warning or instruction it has caused personal injury in the likes of mental suffering.

In a totally related story, a psychologist last year declared Clardy a psychopath. (via The Oregonian)

More solid crime stories: The Worst Crimes Committed By Pro Athletes

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