BREAKING: Jaime Pressly Is Still Alive

Good news, everyone. Jaime Pressly is still alive. And before you ask, yes. Still would. Mostly because I remember this. I know all you kids nowadays are on Facebook demanding to know which media outlet gave Hilary Clinton the coin to use last night, but Jamie Pressly was basically Margot Robbie if Margot Robbie was forced to do soft core porn disguised as a movie then got a DUI and recently started a dating a dude whose name autocorrect thinks is made up. You can go back to saying Sanders won in Iowa like Rick Santorum did in 2012 now if you want. Have a blessed day.