43 Things to Memorialize on Memorial Day

Times to remember, people to morn, things that are buried, and those that refuse to be. This Memorial Day, after the BBQ’s and sending our armed forces your dues, make sure to recall those things truly in need of memorializing.

It could be a person, place, or thing. And it has to be either mourned that it’s gone, or noted for even existing in the first place. It’s like what 9GAG is to Nicktoons.



Here’s what to really memorialize on Memorial Day:  



1. G.I. Joe: Retaliation moved back to 2013

 

2. The Age of Innocence



3. Pet rocks



4. Macho Man Randy Savage



5. The last beer in the cooler during a fishing trip



6. Print media

 



7. Trees



8. Grandma



9. Grandpa



10. Dan Harmon (too soon?)



11. That awkward $1.34 left on your Starbucks gift card



12. Your girlfriend going off birth control



13. College (recent graduates only)



14. Jalapeno Cheddar flavored 3D Doritos



15. The time before Star Wars Episode I came out



16. Michael Jackson



17. Diana Ross



18. Pootie Tang

 



19. Your Ex



20. That missing sock



21. “Free period”



22. Nate Dogg

 



23. Your dog



24. Your bank account



25. Your commitment to working out this year



26. Your social life via Diablo III

 

 

27. Reading books

 

28. That moustache you were “trying out”

 

29. Going to Blockbuster (LOL)

30. The righteous indignation you felt during [insert military conflict here]



31. Pogs



32. Jenna Jameson before plastic surgery



33. The current state of your liver



34. Chest hair



35. Limp Bizcut’s “Rollin” video

 

 



36. The first baseball game of summer



37. Your father’s knees



38. The time when you saved the party



39. Arcades



40. Quoting the first Anchorman movie



41. The passing of a loved one



42. Intelligibility of music before Skrillex arrived



43. Independence Day … the movie

 

 

Listen to my podcast Historectomy

 

To celebrate America, and all of its stars and stripes follow me @cravesam

 

 

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