7 Funniest Pre-Flight Announcements

January 13, 2012

Flying sucks. Evidence: air sickness, expensive snacks and babies who want to tell you about all their problems via crying. At least some flight attendants are lightening the mood with amusing jokes, music and mayhem. Perhaps there’s not as much mayhem as I would like, but these funny pre-flight announcements get the trip started right.

Rapping

The last WORD in safety.

Russian

Is very important announcement. You listen.

Pimp

Coffee, tea or Brandi?

Coloring

They sell those safety cards on Etsy, too.

Gay?

Gay.

Mom

She’s not a real flight attendant, she’s a mom. Can you tell?

Hidden Talent

Wait for it.

Geoffrey Golden is the Editor-In-Chief of The Devastator: The Quarterly Comedy Magazine For Humans! Header via, 2.

Comedy Channel Contributor

Geoffrey Golden is a writer AND a fighter from West Hollywood, CA. He's the Editor in Chief of The Devastator, "The Quarterly Comedy Magazine For Humans," sold in bookstores across the country. Geoffrey has also written for a bunch of magically glamorous Hollywood movie studios and websites, including Fox, Warner Bros, CraveOnline, Cracked, Comedy.com, National Lampoon and Lionsgate. As for his fighting experience, Geoffrey has faced off for both the Marvel and Capcom teams, but thinks Ryu and Wolverine should bury the hatchet already.