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Peyronie’s Disease Is the Weighty Affliction of Massively Curved Erections, So How Bent Is Too Bent For Your Johnson?

Can you imagine a world where all penises were exactly the same? Life would be as boring and predictable as sex with an English monarch. Luckily, schlongs come in all shapes and sizes. In fact, some members of the animal kingdom have prehensile erections that can swivel and arc like a phallic Baryshnikov (how do dolphins get anything done?). So where does man stack up in the pecking order of bendy peckers?

Casually mentioned on Late Night with Seth Meyers as the reason Professor X spent his adult life in a wheelchair, Peyronie’s Disease is the weighty affliction that can cause painful erections, severe bending, and yes, a shortening of the joystick. And while it sounds like an obscure and puzzling menace that only happens in scary comic book movies, researchers estimate it affects one in ten dudes over the age of 18. That means more guys have a bendy boner than watch football on Sunday.

Just in case you needed more horror juice for the nightmare machine, one of the main causes of Peyronie’s Disease is sex itself. For instance, every time you use your dresser as a foothold for that steep angle big finish, you build up a little scar tissue underneath your unsuspecting johnson. Sure it hurt so good in the moment, but over time, these “injuries” can accumulate enough scar tissue to get your junk more bent than a bicep curl.

So while it’s true a little curveball can go a long way toward your gamesmanship between the sheets, when is bending it like Beckham too much of a good thing? Follow the long and winding road of bendy erections to find out.

Cover Photo: Kana Design Image (Getty Images)

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