Photo: Brett Carlsen / Stringer (Getty Images)
Punxsutawney Phil, the greatest groundhog in the history of groundhogs, is facing stiff competition for the first time in his weather-forecasting career. By way of Upstate New York, Buffalo Bert is attempting to rain (snow?) on Phil’s parade, making a prediction on the start of winter a week before the famous groundhog has his chance.
In what will surely be a bloody war of groundhogs, Bert is doing all he can to take over as the go-to source for accurate spring-season predictions. Bert has been working the angles to take over the Groundhog Day throne for the past six years.
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Over 800 people attended Buffalo Bert’s festivities last week at a Flying Bison Brewing Company in Buffalo, New York. According to a very real and not fake source, people showed up solely for the groundhog and not the copious amounts of delicious craft beer served to no end.
In anticipation of an early spring, crowds arrived with high hopes. Unfortunately for them, Bret saw his shadow and — surprise, surprise — there will be six more weeks of winter. Spring isn’t coming early this year and you can all go cry now while wearing scarfs and snowboots.
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In all seriousness, Buffalo’s Groundhog Day event does some real good for the area. Proceeds from the festivities go to the local zoo, an animal shelter, and a wildlife center, and one of the founders told a local newspaper they have raised $10,000. Because of that money, animals will get the care they deserve and we can all feel better as humans. Since that’s the case, we’re all for groundhogs doing their thing and looking for their shadows while we donate cash and drink as much beer as possible.