Kiefer Sutherland is Going to Jail

Kiefer Sutherland’s attorney entered a no contest plea on the actor’s behalf yesterday for his September 25th DUI arrest. Sutherland was stopped in Hollywood after making an illegal U-turn and blew a 0.16 when police tested him for alcohol. TMZ reports:

The sentence is complicated, but Kiefer will do 48 days in custody. Kiefer will do 18 days for the probation violation, surrendering December 21. He will serve an additional 30 days for the current DUI and must complete that sentence by July 1.”

Kiefer Sutherland issued the following statement:

I’m very disappointed in myself for the poor judgment I exhibited recently, and I’m deeply sorry for the disappointment and distress this has caused my family, friends and co-workers on 24 and at 20th Century Fox. I appreciate the support and concern that has been extended to me these last weeks both personally and professionally.”

48 days?? Damn. If you’re an actor in Hollywood you could get caught with a truck full of dead orphans and the cop would just ask for your autograph, so 48 days might as well be 48 years. I was fully expecting Kiefer Sutherland to show up for court and the judge would be smiling and daydreaming about his bench turning like a secret bookcase and on the other side would be a butterfly meadow where he and and Kiefer hold hands and skip while little children pet playful lions and a clown makes all the cotton candy you can eat.