Britney Spears is Handsome

Britney is lookin’ so gosh durn fine! Ain’t she? She done ripped out her extensions and paid those nice ladies to tease the last four hairs she has into what appears to be a full helmet of hair. Oh, and thank the lord she’s not wearin’ one-a them there pesky brassieres. Each of the last one too many times I saw her ginormous nipples, I thought to myself, “You know, those nipples aren’t working hard enough. They really could point further South if they tried harder.” So I’m glad Britney agrees. I’m going to go out on a limb here and assume if Britney’s freshly painted nails weren’t wet in picture 4, the paparazzo would have caught Britney scratching her ass, and then, of course, smelling her fingers.

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