Hey Guys, Madonna Promises To Give You Oral Sex if You Vote For Hillary Clinton
Photo: Kevin Winter (Getty Images)
I don’t know about you, but as entertaining (and as horrifying) as this election season has been so far I am so ready for it to end.
We are sure you’ve seen the video of porn stars describing how to give the perfect blow job numerous times, and we are sure you read what women really think about receiving oral sex, but this right here is a tad different. Well, no, that’s a lie, it has to do with oral sex.
Madonna, one of the biggest pop music stars ever, opened for Amy Schumer for some reason (the same Amy Schumer who a bunch of Donald Trump supporters walked out on when she poked fun at Trump). Now, I don’t know why Madonna decided to open for a comedian, but the lord knows Madonna has never been funny, but the 58-year-old decided to take this time to offer the fellas who vote for Hillary Clinton a treat.
Check out what she said thanks to Joe from Twitter:
— Joe (@jgra555) October 19, 2016
Let’s recap what she said:
One more thing before I introduce this genius of comedy: If you vote for Hillary Clinton, I will give you a blowjob, okay? Swear to god. And I am good. I’m good. I’m not a douche and I’m not a tool. I take my time, I, uh, have a lot of eye contact. Yeah? And I do swallow.
Now I doubt any of you wanted that mental image, but hey, if you vote for Clinton you will get a reward promised by Madonna. That might be enough to sway some 70-year-old Trump fan to vote for Clinton. Or that might sway him even more to stick with Trump. Who knows.
h/t Death and Taxes