Time to put on a Darth Vader costume, head over to Death Valley, where the temperature was 129 degrees, run a mile in the sun, manage not to die, perhaps by tapping into the power of the dark side (?), vow to do it again next year and check out these links!
A Guy In A Darth Vader Suit Ran Across Death Valley For 4th Straight Year
http://ftw.usatoday.com/2013/07/a-guy-in-a-darth-vader-suit-ran-across-death-valley/
Despite all that running around outdoors, Vader is still so pale.
36 Cheap American Beers, Ranked
http://deadspin.com/36-cheap-american-beers-ranked-638820035
Happy Beer-Dependence Day!
The Onion: New Michael Bay Romantic Comedy To Focus On Love Story Between Two Explosions
http://www.theonion.com/articles/new-michael-bay-romantic-comedy-to-focus-on-love-s,33010/
Laugh all you want, but people would go see this.
Proof Of Heaven Author Has Now Been Thoroughly Debunked By Science
But science still hasn’t disproven the “heaven is just above the clouds” theory, right?
The 24 Most Pretentious Things Ever
http://www.buzzfeed.com/lukelewis/the-most-pretentious-things-ever
They should call the lute a “pretentiousizer.”
That’s all for this fireworks-filled edition of The Big List.
Geoffrey Golden is the Editor in Chief of The Devastator: The Quarterly Comedy Magazine For Humans!