Beyonce Performed At The Country Music Awards, White People Were Ecstatic

 

Country music is shit and will always be shit. Country is worse than Norwegian prog metal. But white people like it. What they didn’t like is Beyonce opening last night’s 2016 Country Music Awards because OMG WE DON’T WANT THIS CROSSOVER CRAP THIS IS FOR COUNTRY MUSIC FANS AND ALSO SHE HATES COPS AND AMERICA AND SHE’S ALSO BLACK. Understandable. I mean, we didn’t want Taylor Swift either, but you gave birth to that demon and we’re now all suffering. We really shouldn’t think to hard about where country music came from or that the first country album to sell 1M copies was dropped by Ray Charles, we should just focus on the fact that Beyonce doesn’t have a cowboy hat and a ponytail and sings about beer at the lake. You can read the unhinged takes here, or you can watch Beyonce and the Dixie Chicks heal the nation below. Up to you.

 

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