Amanda Seyfried Is Single

Sad news today, friends. I didn’t know Amanda Seyfried and Justin Long had been dating since 2013. I’m really bad at this. Good thing her freakishly big eyes saw this coming for like six months. Seriously. What’s up with her eyes? She’s like an owl you’d bang.

Amanda Seyfried and Justin Long are back to walking red carpets solo…“It happened a few weeks ago,” a source close to the couple reveals in the new issue of Us Weekly. “He’s really heartbroken.” While Long, 37, declared on the Today show in 2014 that the couple was “in it for the long haul,” another source says their relationship has been quietly unraveling. “They had different schedules and different lives,” explains the source. “They just grew apart.”

Justin Long has also put his penis in this, so my sympathy is only gonna last until I get to the end of this sentence. That would be now. It’s now.  He’s outkicked his coverage enough for a dude who does the voice of Alvin. Sorry, bro. Sometimes the universe corrects itself. And since this is an Amanda Seyfried post, I’d like to remind everyone again that she has a dead horse in her house.


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