Hayden Panettiere Is Pregnant

 

“My vagina (to scale) after LOL!”

 

Us Weekly is reporting that Hayden Panettiere is pregnant, because “pregnant” is the only word science has for this kind of thing. If Hayden’s pregnancy goes full term, it will be first succesful instance of interspecies breeding. Congrats to the happy couple.

Hayden’s headed to mommyhood! Hayden Panettiere is pregnant and expecting her first child with fiance Wladimir Klitschko, a source reveals exclusively in the new issue of Us Weekly. “Hayden is totally pregnant!” the insider tells Us of the Nashville star, 24, who has been engaged to Klitschko, 38, for a year.

This is just another ploy by Obama and Putin to manipulate Hayden into orchestrating an epidural shortage in an effort to help the black market Russian economy, but I also expect this baby to come out swinging Hayden’s spine whle wearing a Viking helmet and bear skin cape.

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