People Are Mad Because They Didn’t Say ‘God’ In ‘Noah’

 

Because Hollywood just knew Mel Gibson used hundred dollar bills from the bukkake of millions he made from The Passion of The Christ (he made it with $30M of his own money) to burn Jews in his basement humidor, Hollywood is about to pass around their own collection plate and unleash so many God movies on you soon  (Son of God, that one documentary that just came out, Moses with Christian Bale, a Cain and Abel story as vampires with Will Smith, etc) that nobody will be able to park at a theater because they’ll be filled with church buses. Sony and 20th Century Fox have already set up “faith-based studios” to crank out as many Fireproof‘s as they can, but if you’re a huge Hollywood studio, you can’t be a slave to two masters. Either you want to appeal to people who wear sweatshirts with an airbrushed picture of Jesus on it over their turtleneck, or you try to appeal to godless liberals. And by trying to appealing to godless liberals, I mean director Darren Aronofsky omitted the word “God” from the script and turned Noah into Captain Planet.

Darren Aronofsky wrestles one of scripture’s most primal stories to the ground and extracts something vital and audacious, while also pushing some aggressive environmentalism, in Noah…..Already banned in some Middle Eastern countries, Noah will rile some for the complete omission of the name “God” from the dialogue, others for its numerous dramatic fabrications and still more for its heavy-handed ecological doomsday messages, which unmistakably mark it as a product of its time….

So Noah was a hippie and didn’t mention or thank his lord and savior like he was at the BET Awards. Cool. I can see why some people would be mad at that. Moses not mentioning God in a movie is like Pitbull not mentioning a major city in one of his songs. You’re confused at first, but then you realize they’re both fictional characters.

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