Britney Wants Justin Back

Britney Spears, who allegedly lost her virginity to Justin Timberlake, is reportedly desperate to get him back. Friends say she has been talking about Justin for months and supposedly only dated Isaac “Eyezik” Cohen to make Justin jealous. A source says:

Britney gets an ego boost by parading her piece of eye candy around! Britney hopes Justin will think more of her now she’s been seen with a successful guy like Isaac, because she isn’t hanging out with a loser like Kevin anymore. She wants to prove she can still land a good-looking and desirable guy.”

It’s unclear at this point what level of retard Britney is (she hasn’t been tested yet), but she’s probably somewhere between a frog and this can of Coke. Yeah, Justin’s gonna be real jealous. Isaac Cohen is Kevin Federline with a Star of David on his wifebeater. He’s so successful that no one has ever heard of him. Meanwhile, Justin is in a hotel somewhere with Jessica Biel’s panties in his teeth. Britney’s plan can’t go wrong!


Update: Here’s K-Fed’s Nationwide Super Bowl commercial for those of you who haven’t seen it yet.


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