Lindsay Lohan Wants to Go Topless

Lindsay Lohan told Cosmopolitan magazine that she would appear topless in a film only if she knew it meant that she would win an Oscar. The actress claims that she’s already “OK with being topless in front of people” and has already flashed some boob.

Only two years ago, the mere thought of Lindsay Lohan naked would spill enough semen to make even Elton John and Jake Gyllenhaal push away from the table. Now, the only way to fit her naked, bony mess into a script is if it was about zombies or people who live in an attic. I’m not sure if anybody has explained this to Lindsay, but you don’t get an Oscar just for being topless. Granted, it’s probably hard enough to explain that the sun has been up for eight hours to a person who’s walking around in one high heel, trying to wipe the coke off her face and wondering aloud why her anus hurts. She’ll probably just think it was a long flash of lightning.

Lohan at the 14th Annual Elton John Oscar Viewing Party: