‘War of the Worlds’ has a third trailer

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Moviefone is exclusively hosting the last trailer for this summer’s War of the Worlds, directed by Steven Spielberg and starring Tom Cruise, and it looks pretty damn great. If you don’t know the basic story, Moviefone has a description:

“When (Cruise’s) small-town existence is shaken violently by the arrival of Martians bent on sending Earth into oblivion, he must come to the defense of his children, overcoming an even more potent enemy — the demons that lurk within.”

Actually, go ahead and ignore that description, because it’s pretty damn dumb. I’ve been known to masturbate at inappropriate times, but never so hard that my ‘demon within’ flipped over a ferry filled with cars or incinerated an overpass. And I’ve really had at myself a few times. Like that quiet time in my bedroom. Except replace the word “quiet” with “drunk” and “bedroom” with “Taco Bell drive-thru”. It was such a buzz-kill when that cock-blocker behind the counter knocked on my window and said, “Sir … you can’t do that here.” That’s not how my fantasy went at all.