Britney Spears is Bringing Sexy Back

So it turns out I’m doing this all wrong. Unlike Britney, I avoid clothes which are not my size. I also shun clothes designed by catty gay men who want me to hate myself for not being built like a boy. Futhermore, unlike Britney, I look in the mirror from every angle before I leave the house. However, in all fairness, my reflection isn’t very smart. For instance, the other day I wrote “sweet” on my forehead, but when I looked in the mirror, reflection spelled it “cunt.” See? Total dummy.