Katie Holmes Is Banging Jamie Foxx

Katie Holmes and Jamie Foxx rumors have been going around for what seems like forever now, but nobody ever really paid much attention. But Katie has been looking really dark recently, so there might be some truth to this. See, because Jamie Foxx is black and his semen…look, I don’t need to explain science to you people.

In this week’s issue of PEOPLE, multiple sources confirm the pair have been spending time together for well over a year – but it’s nothing serious.  “This is not some intense romance,” a source with knowledge of the situation tells PEOPLE. “Jamie and Katie are friends and have been for a long time. They are two adults who are attractive and single, and so apparently conclusions will be drawn.”  Adds the source: “But contrary to those conclusions, they’re not about to run off and make some serious commitment.”

Wow. So to translate, Katie Holmes and Jamie Foxx aren’t dating but are friends who occasionally bang like two consenting adults with no expectation of commitment. They should do a success story ad for Tinder.