Tomi Lahren Got Fired

Fate whispers to the warrior, “you cannot withstand the storm” and the warrior whispers back, “I am the storm.” #TeamTomi #igotthis #texassky

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Last week Tomi Lahren got “suspended” from The Blaze for saying on national television that women should have autonomy over their own bodies. Obviously, that’s a fireable offense at a place run by a conservative old white dude. This weekend they fired my hot, grudge fuck fantasy boo.

Tomi Lahren won’t be appearing on Glenn Beck’s multiplatform network, TheBlaze, anymore. Sources say Lahren — who was suspended last week after flip-flopping on abortion and declaring herself pro-choice — has been banned permanently. “Glenn is reminding the world of his conservative principles by sidelining Tomi after she insulted conservatives by calling them hypocrites,” one Beck insider told me.

Yes. Calling conservatives hypocrites is what got her fired. Yeah, ok. But it is great to see that conservatives and liberals have a lot in common. Like taking money out of anyone’s wallet who doesn’t believe every issue of their political ideology works for every single person on the planet. It’s almost like every human has their own mind and priorities. Weird. I have my own mind and one of my priorities is to have unprotected sex with Tomi Lahren then supporting her decision to have an abortion. This is something I firmly believe in, so I feel we should practice a few times.